Gotcha! This isn’t really an open letter to “the haters.” I’m not even sure who “the haters” are, although there are certain people out there who like to refer to this nebulous group of vengeful people whenever possible. These individuals find themselves so important and controversial that they believe there is a troupe of dissenters out there whose mission is to willfully detest their every move. I hate to say it, but if you’re not Beyonce or Hillary Clinton or LeBron James or someone of similar notoriety, this is almost surely not the case.

This letter is actually for the people who are always so quick to conclude that anyone who expresses displeasure with either them or someone they like is “hating.” When you accuse someone of “hating on” another, the implication is that they are jealous or wish, in some way, that they were more like the person they’re hating on. I’m not saying there’s not plenty of actual hate going around. And there are some people who are certified haters. I am sure that I have been hated on and that I have, in turn, hated, at some point (or even many points) in my life. But please stop confusing criticism, or even honest dislike, with hate. No one in this world, particularly a public figure, is above reproach. As I mentioned before, someone like Beyonce definitely has her share of haters. But everyone who says something against the girl isn’t hating on her. So when I say House of Dereon clothes are ugly, it’s because I think they’re ugly, not because I am hating on Beyonce and Mama Tina. When I criticize Al Sharpton, it’s because I have very valid reasons — examined ad nauseum in this blog — to criticize him. I am not hating on Rev. Al. Trust me.

And if you’re a normal, non-famous person who can’t stop talking about the haters, look at the phrase “they’re just hating on me” for what it is — an excuse to avoid some much-needed self-reflection or to blame interpersonal issues on everyone else’s jealousy. Of course, regular folks can also be victims of some genuine, good ol’ fashioned hating. Your current significant other’s ex spreads vicious, false rumors about you? Well, he or she might be a hater. Or maybe you really are so fabulous and blessed that it forces everyone around you into a lifetime of haterdom. But let’s face it, ladies and gentleman, human emotions are rarely that simple.

Much Love (even to the haters),

L