Damn, I hate to say it (and I’m sure I’ll get flack for it even though it’s true), but that Glamour rep was kind of right. They obviously consulted a black woman or black women and asked them.

I would NEVER wear my hair in a hairstyle such as cornrows to my office. The most drastic I’ve ever worn my hair in a corp setting was *gasp* pig-tails. Thankfully we have a casual dress-code so I didn’t look too off.

In regards to an office setting, I would equate an afro to having a mohawk, mullet or tail. Too casual for that type of enviroment.

I agree. Some hairstyles are not appropriate for certain places. Btwn gigs I once worked at an investment bank and it was uber stuffy. Everyone had to conform to the super corporate dress and appearance code. It wasn’t racist. If a white person showed up with a mohawk or some other punk rocker-type hair they’d be shown the door (a stern talking to) just like I would have if I showed up with dookie braids(!) or an afro. Some companies take a little too far…my aunt used to work for State Farm and she told me that you couldn’t have braids there. No kind of braids at all, regardless of your position within the company. This may have changed, but that was only a few years ago.

I think that is ridiculous. Sorry JillyBean819, but I think equating an afro with a mowhawk is foolish.

Fact: I cannot relax my hair, it is too soft and will break. I wear it in natural styles - braids, afro, cornrows - because that is what is best for it. How dare anyone tell me that wearing my hair the way nature intended it is ‘too political’ or a no-no. That is disgusting. I don’t want to have to put chemicals in my hair to be ‘accepted’. And I feel that any black person that feels they should is kinda lost.

I do understand how some styles - cornrows on men, unkempt dreads - are a no-no at the office. But I feel for the most part this ladies ‘ideas’ stem from her assumptions about black hair and black people in general.

ok, i usually never comment on these pages, but i am little frightened by the comments i’ve seen so far. why on earth would an afro seem to be equally as inappropriate as wearing a mohawk to work?? if that is your hair in its natural state as long as it is clean and well kept it should be deemed no different than wearing your hair out if it’s straight. i have worn my own hair both long and straight and natural in a conservative corporate environment and i have never been treated in any way other than as a professional and it is because that is how i expect to be treated regardless of whether or not someone agrees with my natural hair appearing professional.

Well I guess I’m a don’t! I work in an office and I wear my natural hair in a fro sometimes and in twist outs. I’ve worn braids, have a weave right now, or just wrapped my hair in a scarf. The thing is the only people that dont like it are other Black people. White people always comment on how they wish they could do so much with their hair to me.

I stopped relaxing my hair 5 years ago and plan to never relax it again. No one can tell me that my natural self is NOT professional. As for an above comment having an afro can not equate to having a mohawk in anyway shape or form. Putting poisonous chemicals on my scalp is not for me. No offence to anyone who does it but I have never felt better than when I cut off my relaxed hair and accepted my own God given beauty.

Wrong, the Glamour rep wasn’t even “kind of right.” Not only is it ridiculous to claim as political things as surface as dreads and afros, but it becomes downright offensive when a very natural thing is considered offensive to sensibilities. Mohawks take a rare effort to create, but an afro is what happens when black men and women let their hair grow. Maybe long hair on men, regardless of color, is unacceptable within an office, but long hair on women is accepted nationwide. Even if it was a discussion of politics, what does an afro politically stand for? Is it any worse than someone wearing a red ribbon or an American flag on their lapel?

You’re right on. Of course you should never have to relax your hair. I don’t relax mine, and haven’t had a relaxer in 7 years, but my ceramic flat iron and I are BFF. I think it boils down to this: if you want to work in corporate America then YOU WILL conform to a certain extent. Hair, clothes, something. Me..I change my hair color every two minutes, I have tats and piercings….so I work in the movies. If working in an office was important to me, I would look different.

I understand conforming to certain standards. But having to deny a part of you that is natural, because others consider it ‘political’ or an aesthetic faux-pas is wrong.

Tattoos, hair colour, piercings - these are all things I love - and would happily put away for the sake of a good job because none of them are natural, I’m not born with them. Unlike my afro hair which - as Cord pointed out - is part of me, me being a black person, that is what my hair is.

If you break down what the woman said - and the whole ideal - it is very racist: Black people, being who you naturally is not construed as ‘professional’.

It makes me angry that a. anyone feels they can make rules like that for me and b. that some Black people so readily accept it.

Where shall I begin… Ah yes. Eurocentric standards of beauty have so many of us confused it saddens my heart FOR REAL! I have had my hair naturally curly for 5 GOOD years and should have had it for 36 years. Our hair is BEAUTIFUL in every stage and way. Our GOD GIVEN texture is not a style analagious to a mullet, tail or mohawk. It is what God gave us. I work in advertising which is more relaxed BUT if I worked at a Big Law or IB or anywhere, best believe and trust my hair would be naturally curly and I would wear it PROUD. Braids too. How can we change the tides if everyone STAYS brainwashed.

“Black women would TAKE OVER THE WORLD if we can just get our hair right”
- Simone Pratt (me)

Note to self: don’t diss the fro.

blackmistressdiva - At least not in Brooklyn

Check out www.missjessies.com I am on there in all my curly glory

Love those pics!

Don’t be mad that a white woman said it because anyone in or joining the corporate world knows it’s true. It may raise eyebrows because it’s actually being stated, but it is what it is. Also note how prettier, thinner, younger, unmarried (=probably not about to get pregnant) women succeed in the business world far more than their less attractive, heavier, older, married/married with children female counterparts. Some facts are hard to swallow and if you want to go far, it’s best to get in line and save your individuality for when you start your own business… or join a liberal arts institute where dreads give you credibility when you’re teaching African American history or literature to white kids.

My aunt started a business and she refuses to hire fat people and mothers because she thinks they’ll make her business less productive. Discrimination goes all ways.

P.S.: I don’t think it’s right by the way. It just is. When you get to the top, you can change the culture but I’ve noticed that those who try to change things from the bottom oddly enough never get to the top.

Braids are fine as long as they are always fresh, neat, small and pulled back. I think that SOME dreads would be fine like the kind my old hairdresser used to do on others. They were very neat, BUT if you’re male, don’t try it.

It’s a lot harder to be a woman in the corporate world than a man. If we spent the time and energy we do on polishing our professional image on doing work, the work place would be a lot more productive, but alas, our image has as much to do with our advancement as our work. If you think hard work conquers all, think again.

Daria. I understand what you’re saying. I understand what is behind the woman’s comments - and to a greater extent how the world, racism, sexism and all.

But if you know something is not right you have every right to challenge it. Just because it is the way it is, doesn’t me we can’t say things should be different, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.

I’m so heated today. Enough already. I’m off for ice cream.

I agree with you thought I don’t think it’s possible to successfully challenge the norms of a mostly white, mostly male chummy culture from the bottom as a black woman, especially when there are few black (or non-white) people and even fewer females on the top to support you. At the bottom (where pretty much all under 30 people… “Associates” and Junior fill-in-the-blanks are), everyone is very replaceable and they can keep you there indefinitely until you decide to leave yourself. It’s not at all a meritocracy.

I wish there were more women in higher places, but for one reason or another, they are either squeezed out or frustrated enough to not want to stay. I absolutely agree with you and I suppose I too should be heated, but after dealing with such issues particularly for the last 3 months, I now just shrug and accept it. I don’t think there’s anything more demoralizing than seeing all the truths that you knew existed play out in front of you. The hair is just a morsel of it.

These arguments in support of her statement are absurd, akin to saying, ‘well, whites in America expect segregated facilities so you have to conform to their expectations to get ahead. That’s just how it is.’

I work in big pharma. I just cut out the last of my relaxer. I wore cornrows while I transitioned and now I wear my afro (in a puff) most days. Most of the time I’m the only black person inthe room. It occured to me that if a company is uncomfortable with your blackness, all the assimilating the world isn’t going to do you a damn bit of good. You are still going to be the black chick. If the company values your contribution and values you as a person, your hair shouldn’t be a concern.

As your making white people uncomfortable, their ignorance is their problem,not mine.

Agreed lele19106 and carlagirl…

Daris you accepting it does not make it better or go away. You seem to be part of the problem not the solution. Not saying to “rage against the machine” but your thought process is a tad scary…

Lauren aren’t Miko and Titi at Curve geniuses?!?!?!? LOVE those ladies, vision and PRODUCTS! I have not told my hubbie how much they cost though

BTW - naturally curly hair and locking your hair are not POLITICAL statements. They are what God gave us. To me a weave or a relaxer are political statements. But that is me…

I would invite you all to spend a day at my work place so maybe you’d get it, but I’m sure security would throw tear gas at the sight of 10 or more people of color gathered together at the same time.

LOl Daria! What industry do you work in? My husband use to work at Goldman Sachs in private wealth and they did not have facial hair. Unsaid rule… So I know some industries are tough - HOWEVER - I am a buck the trend/system kinda gal. I wear my curly locks in a low bun or ponytail because my hair is distracting. Maybe casual Friday I wear it all out. Actually I am lying I have it all out today with a wide leather headband… It is the attitude you affix with your hair. It is not a statement - it is what God blessed me with.

I wish someone would not like my hair

Sounds like Iraq.

Thank you , daria. Your posts were right on with my thinking.

Please trust that when I go in for an interview I will have my hair pulled back in a ponytail (or other modest hair-do not a weave ponytail down to my waist) with a pant or skirt suit on, nice shoes, and modest jewelry. I learned that in a college course that I took. That applies to anyone regardless of race.

Once you get the job and work yourself up to the position/pay that you would like, then you test the waters and see if it is okay to do something a little different with your hair.

In regards to wearing your hair natural or in a fro or whatever, do whatever you’re comfy with! Shit, I’ve been getting my hair relaxed since I was in grade school. So that’s the only style I know. My hair is thick and breaks off like a mofo if it’s not constantly straightened (I guess I can thank my Indian, Dutch, & black ancestors for that). If you wear yours natural then whatever, as long as you have a good job and are getting paid well then GREAT!

that was for Daria.

I didn’t mean that ur hair sounded like iraq. lol

Jilly -

Trust me your “Indian, Dutch, & black” hair would stand a better chance WITHOUT a relaxer. It breaks because of the two differing textures. You cut it all off to the new growth and grow it out and it will be STRONG healthy and shiny. I did and never looked back. LOVE my curls I get stopped all the time by people asking what I do. I say: “I wet it, add conditioner and leave the house”. Our hair is beautiful never forget that

I had to give the relaxer up when I tried the dreaded color plus relaxer combo about 10 years ago. And y’all know how that turned out…….

My hair issues, of course, stem from by daddy’s ppl. Thanks to him I have thickness and length, but did not get the natural straightness all my cousins have (thanks, mom) which his family never, EVER lets me go a visit w/o mentioning.
“How does your mother deal with all that KIND of hair?” can really fuck you up as child. LOL.

Blackmistress:

First off we don’t need natural straightness. Sure thick and long equals time. My hair was thick as Chaka Khan after THREE encores as my father use to put it and past my elbows. And it was beautiful! I got a relaxer to save time but went back natural and LOVE my hair. It is to my shoulders now (past it when blown out Dominican style).

The baggage we have in our community runs DEEP but we have to change all that. We are not lil girl’s anymore so what was said then can be left behind.

I say thank your mom for your thickness not in jest but for real! You will have more hair in your older age and be grateful. Always be thankful for what God gives you before He TAKES IT AWAY

Forgot to mention it breaks my heart when grown Black women do not love their hair and want it straight. Reminds me of the white doll Black doll experiment.

I was more telling that story in jest as any baggage I have regarding a lot of things is being taken care of by a very over priced therapist lol, but I just prefer my hair stright to having birds trying to nest in it that’s all. Oh, and I am thankful for the thickness. Thin hair would be terrible.

…and I don’t think flat ironing my hair means I do not love it, love my black self or anything else. In fact, I love my hair. I love myself. Some would say too much. LOL. My hairstyle means very little. What I do on a daily and how walk in the world does.

I got a relaxer for the first time in years because braids started cutting my hair actually. I wanted to do the natural look but after my pressed hair (thanks to the Dominicans as none of the black salons I contacted near me “work with that texture.” I just moved. I thought it was hilarious at first how the black salons were but then I got angry…) turned into a fro within hours, I just got a relaxer. Again from the Dominicans because after my experience with the black salons, I wasn’t about to go pay them $150 to do a job that someone else would do for $60. The relaxer wasn’t very strong. I don’t know what kind it is, but it feel healthy still and I hope it stays that way. They do it every 3-4 mos instead of every 6 weeks too.

Brooklynisis, it’s similar to Goldman’s. I’m not good at being fake (without sounding like I’m mocking someone) so it’s been… “a challenge.”

I hear you Blackmsitress

I blow my hair out for variety… I misunderstood your story

[…] How To Succeed In Business: Get A Relaxer - Stereohyped “Glamour magazine…recently dispatched an unnamed editor to an NYC law firm to present a slide show to employees about the dos and don’ts of professional dress. The conclusion? Black hair is a em>BIG don’t.” (tags: hair workplace discrimination) […]

i work in a very large corporate law firm (u know, the pinnacle of conservative work attire) and they are fine with dreds, braids, and low-fros on its black employees. god forbid they violate their airtight diversity policies…

with regard to the relax vs. natural debate, i think people are becoming a bit draconian in their adamant disapproval of one option or the other. it reminds me a lot of the rhetoric during certain periods (and sects)…women who decided to stay home and raise their children as opposed to working were seen as sell-outs. but in the end, it’s all about having the right to choose, to have options, to live your life free of restrictions from society. why can’t black women do the same? sure, we have historically straightened our hair for the sake of fitting dominant culture beauty norms, but at the same time, i think our hair styles have evolved to the degree that it’s anything BUT trying to fit the norm. it’s about variety folks, and when i’m rocking the natural look, it takes forever to see any length (i have soft mini corkscrew curls, so shrinkage is the bane of my existence) and 18 hours to get it straight if i want to wear if that way to match an outfit or a ‘look’…yet when my hair is relaxed, i miss my natural volume and curls…

we should get over this do-or-die approach to hair and live and let live. women with natural hair don’t want to be judged because they left things as is, so i think they should refrain judgment toward women who have made the choice to relax. it’s limiting, close minded, and, in my opinion, a sign of insecurity when one constantly seeks to put down others to make their choice seem optimal.

Brooklynisis,

Please trust. When I tried going without a perm for about a year and a half, it was a nightmare.
I sweat from my head so the second I’d step outside on hot humid Detroit day, the *puff* any style I had was destroyed! I hated it. I like my hair straight.
I just hate how black people always say, straightening your hair is conforming to white society. Please, it’s a style choice just like dying your hair a different color. I just like to wear it straight because it’s more manageable for me since I’m lazy and like to do my hair quickly without my hair being tangled. I’m proud of myself now. I can wash, blow, and curl in about 1 1/2 hours. Top that!

Jilly -

I am not judging you at all! I only think when people think they NEED to relax because it is easier, there may be a problem.

LOL yup I can top that: I can wash and go in 1 minute and when I get a blow out at the dominican salon I am in and out in 45 minutes or less if no line and it is straighter than with a relaxer. My mom has a relaxer like you to make it faster for her and she can wash, blow and curl in like 20 mins (she washes her hair before work or church sometimes). But that is her and me and our hair. We are all individuals. That is the beauty of us. All I am saying is just don’t think that our natural hair is to disdain, a problem or is difficult. It is not.

The choice is yours! Shoot I like my hair straight too sometimes, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE my natural texture. I work WITH it not against it. So stepping out in any humid hot day is fine.

It is not about conforming. It is about loving what God gave you and not thinking you “need” to do anything else. Choice - fine. Need to change - not.

I love healthy discourse on matters like this!!!

I meant to add my mom does not think she NEEDS a relaxer, she just likes her hair straight better… I hope I am articulating this clearly!

Even though we already know this, this thread has proved that the topic of our hair still strikes a nerve for a lot of us. I think it’s awesome that we are using this forum to discuss it. Something as simple as our hair is a very complicated thing b/c is symbolizes and identifies us a people. The degree to which each of us equates hair with identity is where we differ. And, that’s a good thing. The good news is that we have the best hair in the world. No one else can press it, braid it, flip it, twist it, dread it, lock it, fro it, straighten it, spike it or curl it like we can. We have the ultimate choice and therefore the ultimate hair.

[…] but how many people actually believe this? How many times do you have to hear that your hair is “too political,”that your accent is distracting, that your eyes are too small, that your hair is not thick […]

True. I come from a long line of women who don’t know how to do hair (or put on make up or wash dishes or cook or do any of those “woman” things) so it really baffles me that people choose anything other than convenience.

Half of the women in my family have braids. The other half go in weekly to get their hair done. It looks good for a day and they look crazy for the rest of the week (looking at reflection and shaking my head) because the art of wrapping hair at night cannot be taught to everyone. My head was cut low like my brother’s until they hired a nanny who did hair.

You don’t know how to wrap your hair? Whaindaworld?

Hope this helps. Just skip down to the bedtime wrap portion. I used to just spray with old sheen before I did this, 2 or 3 times a week.
http://www.motionshair.com/M_ybl/M_ybl_hw.cfm

I’ve been living in Oregon now since 1988. Since there not many black people living here and I didn’t trust the beauticians here, I chose to start wearing my hair in a TWA. Even though more of us have moved here, some very competetent hairdressers amongst them, I still choose to keep my short natural because it is what works best for me and the way I live my life. Yes, I got all sorts of criticisms not so much about compromising any sort of upward mobility, but mainly about how it would negatively impact my ability to get and keep a man…and even that turned out not to be true. My man LOVES my natural hair, and doesn’t want me to get weaves, wigs or straighteners. If sistas would give themselves a chance to just “be themselves” they’d be surprised to find out that many people do appreciate natural hairstyles. I found this out for myself this past April when I attended a songwriters conference in Los Angeles and spent a day in Malibu, the land of the bleached blonde botoxed barbie doll. SEVERAL men there complimented this 46 year old grandmother on the natural hair…boy, was that an ego boost!

IMO Glamour Magazine is a load of crap as are most women’s magazines, including the ones geared toward us black women. Those publications exist for one reason only: to push products that people don’t really need. They try to make women feel like there is always something wrong with them, and the only way to “fix” themselves is to conform and buy the products they advertise in order to conform. I won’t waste my money on that trash…better to get your beauty advice from within and from the Bible (Proverbs 31:30)

Of course, it’s a woman’s personal choice how they want to wear their hair, but don’t use corporate america as an excuse for not wanting to accept yourself as you are….the way I see it, if a company cannot value me for what’s INSIDE my head but instead want to judge me because of how I fix what’s on top of it, then I wouldn’t want to work for that company!

lele, I’ll try it but I think I might need a YouTube video or maybe a few practice sessions with a hair stylist to get it. I’ve googled it many times and no, there are no YouTube videos on the topic

Most days, I want to cut it but the luxury of having hair is that whatever skin flaws you are less obvious. If Eva and Nnenna on TopModel had little blemishes here and there, they would not have gone far because short hair draws more attention to your face (and whatever issues you’re having). Note how all the girls on that show with bad skin generally get weaves… My skin looks like crap and it’s harder to deal with than hair. The day I get balanced, unscaly skin is the day I get that buzz cut.

[…] Slightly-racist Glamour editor willing to tolerate black people, but only so long they promise to avoid making any icky political statements. Like having long […]

[…] Glamour felt the heat from their staffers presentation on professional “Hair Don’ts” and is attempting damage-control. […]

UMMM plase lauren hill looks good and yall no it, please stop disin he black hair do’s cause back in the day if we aint have perms everyone black would rock the afro and dreads. Also Ive seen white men/women wearin dreads and afro’s put they pics on here and lets talk about that!!!!!!!!!!Any comments I dont think so.

Not everyone looks good in dreads. Maybe it’s the length or the fact that she generally looks sloppy recently, but it’s not working for her. I definitely don’t like fros on people with round face.

[…] “political hairdo’s” have no place in a corporate setting. At the time, people were less than pleased. But, evidently, editor-in-chief Cindi Leive was of the thinking that the I-G-N-O-R-E policy was […]

[…] are still so passionate about hair and the issues that it evokes. You hear something like the Glamour incident and the Don Imus incident, and you realized that these issues will never go away. I would […]

Whatev. I don’t really care about afros, but dreadlocks are the most disgusting things I’ve ever seen, and this doesn’t just apply to my black folk. All I know is, any person I’ve ever seen with dreadlocks was super nasty and I wouldn’t want to come within 5 feet of them.