• If this is a beautiful face, then I’m Neferiti…or Cleopatra. Either one works. []

• Trey Songz was arrested. We’d all care more if he was just a little more famous. Still sucks, though. [AHH]

• And they say our credit’s bad? []

• Prince and his lawyers love to sue, and his fans are starting to get pissed. [PH]

• Protesters continue to picket outside the BET execs’ houses, and the New York Times just noticed. [NYT]

Some desperate soul, whose name is probably Gary Coleman, is selling Gary Coleman’s signed Gamecube and games on ebay. Let’s suspend reality for a minute and pretend that people are really looking to buy Gamecubes like that — who in their right mind would purchase something that was touched by hands and arms that haven’t seen lotion since Diff’rent Strokes went off the air? It’s called Vaseline Intensive Care, Gary.

You think you know John Amos, and then he totally throws us all for a loop. The Good Times/Roots/Coming to America/Men in Trees actor, who is originally from East Orange, NJ, has decided to cut a country album with members of Johnny Cash’s family.

“Country Music is all about storytelling. That’s what makes John perfect for this genre,” said Gene Cash. “We worked with him closely and helped him discover his singing voice as well. John Amos is country music.”

Cash picked up on Amos’ talent over the summer during several trips the TV star made to Nashville. Songs on the album include the title track, written by 17-year-old Eric Cash of the Cash family, as well as other Johnny Cash originals including “Hopelessly,” “Independence Day” and a tribute to the late county legend titled, “When Johnny Came to Town.

If he somehow manages to weave “temporary lay-offs/easy credit rip-offs” into one of his tracks, I might be forced to purchase the album.

Earlier today, Oprah Winfrey held a press conference to discuss the scandal at her South African Girls’ School, where a former dormitory matron is accused of physically and sexually abusing students. In true Oprah form, she takes full responsibility for the incident, although she admits that the day-to-day operation of the school is not overseen by her. Basically, she seriously needs to bulk up the hiring process. Non-abusive help is so hard to find.

American Gangster squashed the competition this weekend, putting Jerry Seinfeld’s Bee Movie in second place. Just think how much more money AG could have made had it not been pirated weeks ago.

And I guess that squash is a strong word to use when Bee Movie still made a respectable $39.1 million, but did anyone notice that Seinfeld gave his old buddy Michael Richards a part in his animated film? Maybe the presence of Oprah Winfrey and Chris Rock in the cast evens things out. Or maybe nobody gives a shit about Michael Richards’ “nigger” rant. We’ve got bigger fish to fry. Like Duane “Dog” Chapman, for instance.

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While R. Kelly schedules tour dates and, undoubtedly, writes more and more installments of “Trapped in the Closet,” the trial that seemed like it would never start will go on without him. A Chicago judge ruled last week that a forensic specialist can testify, in a hearing, about her methods to determine that R. Kelly is the man in the infamous sex tape.

The court will then rule whether or not her testimony is admissible. The specialist is expected to explain how she identified R. Kelly using the veins in his hands and how she determined that the child in the tape was 14-years-old. Knowing R. Kelly’s dumb (and I do mean dumb) luck, they evidence will probably be thrown out. [MTV]

Does Ciara look so happy at the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo because, as the 3am Girls allege, 50 Cent sent a chartered plane to Monaco filled with rose petals, teddy bears, and chocolates? Lord I hope not. I say she’s just a naturally happy girl. More pics from the show after the jump.

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Naomi Campbell’s recent trip to Venezuela to meet with Hugo Chavez is seen by a terrorist group as a “slap in the face” to Bush and his policies. Who knew terrorists could have so much fun with words!

The supermodel said, “I’m not here to be political” as she met with the left-wing Venezuelan president, though she reportedly said, “I hate Bush” when she was in Sao Paulo, Brazil.

Abu Nasser, chief of the Al-Aqsa Martyrs’ Brigades terror group in the Old City of Nablus in the West Bank, said:”The visit presents a slap in the face to Bush and his government and his policy. The fact that she respects Chavez, and his ideals, can bring more people to follow this step.”

First of all, unless the two are old friends, I’m not sure how a meeting with Hugo Chavez could be seen as not political. Second of all, Naomi Campbell is a model, and not even an American one. She can pretty much take a meeting with anyone without causing a bit of political change. []

Have you ever wondered what happened to Jon B? You know, the white R&B singer who did what Robin Thicke did first, but not as well? He gave a scruffy performance at an Usher-hosted party at Las Vegas’ LAX nightclub over the weekend. Apparently he has been growing his hair, working on a new album, and developing a taste for microphones in his absence from the public eye.

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When a gorilla is charging toward you, scratch your head and chew leaves? This was Kerry Washington’s survival technique when she almost got attacked while she was filming The Last King of Scotland in Uganda.

At the Movado Future Legends Gala at the Cooper-Hewitt Museum, Washington, a graduate of the posh Spence school, told Webster Hall’s Baird Jones, “I got way too close to a female gorilla, who started toward me. If you run, they run after you. So I did my best gorilla imitation: chewing leaves, head scratch, kneeling. I remembered watching animal behavior on TV and zoo trips.” It worked. “I would not be having this interview now if that gorilla had attacked me.”

Because I never really want to see a black person doing a gorilla imitation, even if it is for survival, I’m going to try not to picture this in my head. []
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